When I attended the 2011 Holistic Centers Gathering on behalf of the Findhorn Foundation, one of the questions people in other communities asked me most often was, “How does Findhorn deal with conflict?”

Life here in a spiritual community, just as anywhere, is full of joys and challenges and it sometimes feels intense, sharing in such closeness with others, especially when conflict arises. As a person whose defense is more likely to withdraw than confront, dealing with conflict is a real growing edge! Living and working closely together in community there are times when I’m faced with the question can I keep my heart open, even in difficult circumstances?

I recognise how sensitive I am when communication is less than clear and harmonious and find such conversations painful. I’ve been exploring the idea lately that perhaps people in community hope to create the family around them that they never had growing up? For me this is deep, authentic communication where feelings match what is being expressed and there is less confusion and anxiety about what’s really going on around and within me… [Read more…]